Do you ever get those moments when your brain turns into a total bitch and just thinks up every possible problem within your relationship and decides that the worst possible reason is totally responsible?
Like recently, for instance, my bfs been distant.. The odd random day of silence, ignoring me at random times, replying really late and kind of avoiding some things that I’ve been saying…
His excuse; he’s been ill.. Totally understandable, would explain it…
my brains excuse; he’s cheating.. No evidence, no real reasoning, it would also explain the absence but being ill works perfectly fine so why fuck everything up?
I have no real reason not to trust him.. He let me down once the whole time I’ve known him and even then he had a pretty solid reason.
My only reason is other guys
Obviously not all guys are the same… For instance.. one guy just strung me along for months.. another lied, cheated and violated me.
But just because they fucked up doesn’t mean that my bf now is, there’s be no real logic linking him to their actions. Yet my brain still does it and then I freak out.
But what am I meant to do at this stage? The only thing that I think might help is by asking him and him telling me that there’s no one else. But I don’t want him to think that I don’t trust him. I’m just being stupid and I know that but I need him to confirm it. I don’t see how I can though without throwing our relationship outta balance. It sure as hell isn’t perfect as it is but I’m not sure if I wanna risk messing it up even more. I’m hoping he’ll understand but it’s quite a big ask when he could think that I’m accusing him of cheating…